Transforming Stress Into A Superpower: Mindset, Resilience & Leadership Tools

We often hear “resilience” and think of toughness, hustle or pushing through. But real resilience isn’t brute force; it’s adaptation. It’s having the capacity to bend without breaking, to choose your response when everything else feels out of control.

I felt this lesson deeply when I heard about Carmen Chacón’s passing in April 2017.

She was Spain’s first female Minister of Defence. At just 37, seven months pregnant, she stood before the troops during an official inspection, breaking not only protocol but expectations.

Many said she couldn’t (and shouldn’t) hold that position, not as a woman and certainly not as a pregnant one. Yet, she did, with determination and dignity.

What most people didn’t know? Carmen had a congenital heart condition, ventricular myocardiopathy, that only her doctor and close family were aware of. Still, she carried out her role with quiet courage. She didn’t slow down. She led. She pushed forward, determined to be the kind of leader the moment demanded, even when her body demanded rest.

Carmen died at just 46, leaving behind an 11-year-old son. I still remember the sadness I felt when I heard the news. People like her, resilient, brave, full of presence, cannot be forgotten. 

Stress: Nature’s Alarm System, Not A Villain

For years, I equated strength with speed: go faster, do more, push harder. But I’ve come to realise that stress isn’t something to be feared or ignored. It can be our ally.

Biologically, stress is our body’s way of mobilising us for challenges. Heart rate rises, cortisol kicks in, and our attention narrows, an ancient system trying to protect us.

But when it stays “on” for too long, it wears us down. Dr. Bruce McEwen called this allostatic load, the cost of chronic stress on our systems, affecting immunity, cognition and heart health.

We need to stop trying to escape stress and start learning how to work with it.

Everyday Stress Is Still High-Stakes

While Carmen’s example is extraordinary, the truth is, most people won’t face military-level leadership or political pressure. They’ll face inboxes full of urgent messages, back-to-back meetings and the constant hum of digital noise.

What I’ve noticed in my work is this: most people working in offices or in front of screens have forgotten how to use their bodies to regulate stress.

They slump into poor posture, shallow breathing and spend hours without moving. One angry email can trigger a threat response, flooding the system with stress hormones and with no physical outlet or awareness, the tension lingers. Without movement or a mindful reset, our thinking narrows and often turns negative.

This is where I draw on Dr. Martin Seligman’s research on learned optimism. If we believe we’re stuck, under threat or failing, we begin to act accordingly. But if we train our brain to see possibility, growth and meaning, the stress becomes not a shutdown, but a wake-up call.

Rewire Your Stress Response:
3 Practices I Like to Use

1. Cognitive Reappraisal

This means reframing a stressful moment as a challenge rather than a threat. When a meeting doesn’t go well, instead of spiralling, I ask:

What is this moment trying to teach me?

Stanford’s Dr. James Gross has shown that this strategy reduces amygdala activation and boosts decision-making. It’s not about denying stress, it’s about using it as information.

2. Breathing (HRV Training)

Dr. Richard Gevirtz, a pioneer in HRV (heart rate variability), discovered that slow, rhythmic breathing (around 5–6 breaths per minute) strengthens our vagal tone, a key to stress resilience.

This type of breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, the “rest and restore” response and helps regulate emotions, reduce anxiety and improve focus. I use it before presentations or when I feel emotionally triggered.

Try this:

• Inhale for 4 seconds
• Exhale for 6 seconds
• Repeat for 5–10 minutes daily

Let your breath smooth your nervous system. Over time, your body learns how to return to calm more quickly.

3. Mindfulness & Focused Attention

In a distracted world, one of the most valuable skills is being present. Daily mindfulness, just five minutes of focusing on my breath or on the sounds around me, can make a huge difference to my day.

Research by Dr. Amishi Jha shows this strengthens emotional regulation and working memory, even under stress. It also creates a moment of pause between stimulus and reaction, what Viktor Frankl called “the space in between”, and in that space lies our power to choose.

What We Can Learn from Leaders Like Carmen

While some freeze or complain under stress, leaders like Carmen Chacón show us what’s possible. She faced criticism, health risk, and gender bias, not with force, but with a steady, quiet presence. She embodied the kind of resilience we rarely teach: composed, determined and anchored in values.

That kind of leadership isn’t born from avoiding stress. It’s born from transforming it.

What This Means for You and Me

Stress isn’t the enemy. It’s the message.

It tells us something important is happening. And with the right tools: breath, awareness and reappraisal, we can respond instead of react.

Here’s what you can do:

• Reframe your stress as meaningful
• Breathe slowly to regulate your body and brain
• Anchor your attention with mindfulness
• Train daily, even if for 10 minutes
• Move your body, it changes your mind
• Choose your response, again and again

Because when we shift our relationship with stress, we don’t just survive pressure—we grow from it.

Ready to Lead With Resilience?

Transforming stress into strength is only the beginning of becoming a truly brain-friendly leader.

If you’re ready to elevate your leadership with neuroscience-based tools that boost wellbeing, unlock creativity, and sharpen decision-making, explore our i4 Neuroleader™ Programs.

With the i4 Neuroleader™ Methodology, you’ll learn practical, science-backed skills to thrive under pressure and create a powerful ripple effect of positive change within your team and organisation.

Sources: 

• Gevirtz, R. (2013). The Promise of Heart Rate Variability Biofeedback: Evidence-Based Applications. Biofeedback
• Gross, J. J. (2002). Emotion regulation: Affective, cognitive, and social consequences. Psychophysiology
• Jha, A. P., Stanley, E. A., Kiyonaga, A., Wong, L., & Gelfand, L. (2010). Examining the protective effects of mindfulness training on working memory capacity and affective experience. 
• McEwen, B. S., & Stellar, E. (1993). Stress and the individual: Mechanisms leading to disease. Archives of Internal Medicine
• Seligman, M. E. P. (2006). Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life. Vintage Books.